An Unfortunate Truth

I’ve been gone. I could say it’s because I was busy – which is true – but that is not the ultimate reason for my absence. Fear. Gosh, this is difficult to admit. Fear paralyzed me. I conquered the fear of creating the page, of writing the first post. I conquered the sickness I felt when I hit post for the first time. Honestly, I had no idea that I would feel so vulnerable every time I blogged. Every post is a piece of me. It’s something I created and the fear of rejection is real—even if it’s just through the phone or computer. 

This is a new feeling for me. I’m not an artist of any kind. Don’t play an instrument or paint. So I’ve never had to put myself out there. And in the face of it all, I stopped. I allowed my fear to convince me, that my posts were obnoxious. That when you saw my link, you rolled your eyes in disgust. So, I quit. 

This week I saw a dear life-long friend that I don’t see often. She asked me about the blog. It’s funny. A great number of people have asked me about it for the last few months, and I always gave a superficial answer. But for some reason I spilled it. I told her the truth. And her response was exactly what I needed. She told me that I had to shed my vulnerability. She has built a booming direct sales business in which she makes women feel good about themselves. But she had to get out of her own way to do that. What if this isn’t about me??????? What if I am called to reach out???? 

If that’s true, I have been failing. My fear won. Thank you friend. Thank you for giving me perspective and once again courage. If my words frustrate you or you aren’t in the mood, please please please scroll on past. I promise. I genuinely prefer to not be one more “thing” in your already overwhelming day. Cause I know that feeling all to well. If not, I promise to bring it. I pray that if you need a chuckle, I provide. And if you need words of hope, I provide that too.   #letthemseeyou
❤️ Shalom 
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